Pardon the interruption.

Sorry, everyone, for another small interruption in our regularly scheduled "Fabulous Foursome" series.

But, this interruption is necessary.

It is important.

It is life-changing (okay, maybe not life-changing, but it's still pretty cool).

If I had more adjectives about how important this is, I would use them here, but I don't.

Click here to watch "J is for Jersey," and to see just how cute my grandparents are.

Do it. Now.

Me and Jen-nay Was Like Peas and Car-rots.

Sorry for the momentary interruption in your regular programming, folks. I had been working on my little "Husbands Say the Darndest Things" post for a few weeks and didn't realize I had set the posting date for Sept. 1 - right in the middle of my "Fabulous Foursome" series.

But, we're back at it now and ready to tackle my best, good friend, Rachel. And, true to the form of my entries about Lock and BK, I'll start with the very first time I met Skitter.

4-H House doesn't rush like normal sororities. Instead, they invite girls to the house to interview the semester before moving in. The weekend I went to interview is the weekend I met Rachel.

Most of the girls there for interviewing weekend were getting ready to go on a campus tour, but, since I had already been on campus a year, it seemed pretty silly for me to go on a campus tour. I decided to go talk to one of the house girls that I already knew to see if it would be okay for me to sit the tour out. When I walked into her room, Rachel was sitting on the bed, getting ready for the tour.

My friend introduced us, to which I said, "Hi, Rachel. Nice name." She replied with, "You, too."

Obviously, we were fated to be best friends.

That next semester, when we moved into the house, we probably chatted at house events, but we really didn't get to know each other well until we had the chance to live together. The first eight weeks I lived at the house, my roommate was a girl from my pledge class and we were assigned to live together. But, the second eight weeks, I got to pick who from my pledge class I wanted to live with. The only problem was, I wasn't terribly close to anyone in my pledge class.

Then, someone suggested to me I ask Rachel to live with me. After all, we were both older - all of the other girls in our pledge class were freshmen, but Rachel was a junior transfer and I was a sophomore (even though we were the same age). It made sense to me.

I made my plans to find her and ask her if she wanted to live with me for the next eight weeks, but she beat me to it. The next thing I knew, she was in my room, asking me if we could live together, being that we were both old (no, not older. Old.).

I told her I was planning to ask her the same thing. We moved into the same room shortly thereafter, and "The Old, Creepy Rachels" were born. It's not that we were overly old. Or creepy, for that matter. The nickname just seemed to work for us, so we stuck with it.

For the rest of her time at the house, Rach and I lived together - eventually adding Lock and Bethany to the mix.

And, if you met all of us together, you would think that Lock and Bethany are the older ones, for many reasons, including:

1. 
   
   Our shared love of Forrest Gump and the ability to quote the movie frequently - and very loudly - in public places.
2. 
   
   Gangster hand signals (please see above).
3. 
   
   Inappropriate yelling at inappropriate times.
4. 
   
   Requiring Bethany and Jessica pick us up at the bar more times than either of us can count, rather than the "Old, Creepy Rachels" picking Bethany and Jessica up at the bar.
5. 
   
   Other stuff, too. But, hey, this is a family show.

And, that's the story of Rachel and Rachel. Or, Skitter and Baumshell. Or, the Old, Creepy Rachels. Whatever you prefer. Next up: the Fabulous Foursome take over the third floor of 4-H House.

Husbands Say the Darndest Things

A few weeks ago, I decided I needed to do a blog post devoted only to the funny things Scoop says.

It didn't take me too long to get enough material for an entire post. And, because of that, I'm sure we'll be doing regular installments of this.

Scoop: "Sit down and watch Footloose with me!"
Me: "Ehhhh. I don't really feel like it."
Scoop: "You mean, I want to sit down and watch a lame-ass '80s movie and you don't? Go sit outside."

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Me: (While watching a '70s rock informercial - because I'm lame) "Why didn't we grow up in the '70s with all of this great music?"
Scoop: "Because, you would have ended up pregnant. Let's be honest - I'm easy."

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Scoop: "I need to bring another white shirt with me this weekend."
Me: "Why?"
Scoop: "In case we have to f*** someone up and I get blood on this one."

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Editor's note: I don't really know what was happening when this one popped out of his mouth. And, for the record, I don't believe this statement to be true...most of the time.

Scoop: "I'm so dumb I need a helmet."

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Scoop: (While eating at Outback Steakhouse) "Ugh. I'm running out of room."
Me: "Well, honey, don't keep eating if you're going to make yourself miserable. We can take it home with us."
Scoop: "No - I'll be damned if I let them win. It's personal now."

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Me: (While at a wedding) "You can't generalize it that way."
Scoop: "Hey - stop stealing my phrases. That's my phrase."
Me: "Since when is 'You can't generalize it that way' your phrase?"
Scoop: "I just said it eight minutes ago when we were talking about boobs. Remember?"

Editor's note: Sadly, we were talking about boobs at a wedding.

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Me: "Are you getting up to put the rest of your sandwich away?"
Scoop: "No - do I look like a quitter to you? I'm tenacious."

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Me: "Really? We're watching a commercial that groups senior care and child care with pet care?"
Scoop: "It makes sense. You're still cleaning up shit, regardless."

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Scoop: "I have a sneaking suspicion our kid is going to be the naked kid. Like, 'Hey - where the hell are your underwear?'"

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Me: (While driving home for Brandon and Becky's wedding...) "Ugh. I've been trying to very gradually pass this cop car and I just can't get it done - he keeps speeding up. I guess I'll just tuck back in behind him."
Scoop: "Sorry, dude."
Me: (A few minutes later) "Hmm. I guess that guy is going to try passing that cop now."
Scoop: "Yep."
Me: (A few more minutes later) "Look at that. That guy that was trying to pass that cop just dropped back, too, because the cop sped up again. I think he enjoys it."
Scoop: "Huh?"
Me: "The cop. He waits for someone to get right up next to him and try to pass him, then he speeds up to see if you have the balls to pass him. I think he enjoys that. I know I would - if I were a cop."
Scoop: "You would. You're a sadistic bastard."

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