Just because you're chained to the porch...

...doesn't mean you can't bark at the cars! And, apparently I'm going to be barking at a specific car when I get my new DVDs in the mail. As per Aunt Cheryl's physical therapist advice, I did something I never thought I would do.

I bought two - count 'em two - exercise DVDs. Cheryl recommended a pilates DVD by a guy named Gilad - she says he's great and easy on the eyes. And, I'm thinking, how good looking can he be with a name like Gilad? Well, I bought the DVD and I see now that Cheryl does pilates just to look at man-candy. Heck, that's a good enough reason for me.

I ordered two and am anxiously awaiting their arrival so I can continue on my work-out streak. Next on the list - DVD player for the living room so I can do my pilates in there and not in my tiny little bedroom. I guess that means a trip to Wal-Mart - one of the most dangerous places on earth for a person with the smallest little bit of money in their account. I'll be strong - just the cheap DVD player.

Until the pilates DVDs come (of which I have been warned extensively - especially their difficulty and ability to quite literally kick my ass), the work-out adventure continues. Tonight, I spent an hour on the treadmill, ran over 4 miles and burned almost 500 calories - go me! I don't really know if that's good or not - but, I feel pretty freakin' awesome.

And now, to my daily Kristina updates:

She got to go outside today! They let her dress in her own clothes and she was able to help get herself dressed. Then, they put her in a wheelchair and let her spend some time outside. I can only imagine how happy that made her - she's very much of an outside person, so I'm sure she was just itching to get out of that hospital bed.

And, of course, my David had something to say about Greb's little outdoor excursion. He told her it wouldn't be anytime before she was in her wheelchair, knocking old people out of the way in the hospital halls. That made me laugh. Then he sent me this email at work:

"Of course I'll have to show her how to corner a wheelchair...
Mom used to hate that when I just went bombing down the hallway. Picture, if you will, me (all 12 yrs and 105 lbs of me) burning down a long hospital hallway (wearing a hospital gown) and attached to an IV pole that I have a hold of with my left hand, while my right hand tries to steer the wheelchair."

That made me laugh out loud.

So, anyway, by all accounts Miss Kris is getting better everyday. I'm hoping by the end of July, she'll be up talking and moving around all by herself.

Shifting gears again. Let's just say, I'm so excited that I'm not going to marry a boy with a funny name. Put them together and it's just two names either way: Baum-Torbert or Torbert-Baum. What brought this on? It's Monday night on Jay Leno. I just saw several less than desirable names. For example:

McMaster-Baites
Must-Reamer
Howser-Annas
Small-Knob

There were several more, but I just can't remember all of them. My parting words to all of you out there. Be glad your name isn't McMaster and your significant other's name is Baites. I have a sneaking suspicion that would follow you around forever. And ever.

The next time you see me...

I'm going to be sore...and hopefully, a little thinner.

Ok, so anyone who knows me knows that I've always had a little issue with my weight. It goes up and down like crazy; in fact, I have a range of about 4 different sizes in my closet because things seem to change all the time. Well, it seems like right now I'm heavier than I ever have been and it's driving me crazy. In under five months (HOLY COW - I've got a WHOLE bunch of stuff that really needs to get done...CRAP!), I'm going to betting married and I, like every other woman, want to look killer on my wedding day. So, drum roll please...

I've been working out like a mad woman. I know, I know...a little out of character. But, for the past two weeks, I have exercised everyday and I'm hoping to be able to drop a few pounds before the wedding. I don't know if I have lost any weight because I'm too cheap to buy a scale, but my pants are getting any smaller, so that's a good sign.

Now, for the Greb update.

Recently, I started emailing Greb's Aunt Jan (and yes, I actually call her Aunt Jan). It's wonderful to be able to talk to her and find out just a little bit more about Kristina and how she's doing. Plus, it's nice to have someone else to talk to. Anyway, Greb has made some BIG strides this week! She's starting to wake up more and more. This week she was writing (actually, scribbling, but the fact that she was trying to write is wonderful!) and has been extremely active. When Aunt Jan was on speaker phone talking to Greb, anytime her dad, Gary, tried to say anything, she would take her hand and cover his mouth so she could hear Aunt Jan. She also unbuttoned Gary's shirt to see the t-shirt underneath: a Metamora redbirds t-shirt. She continues to make wonderful progress, due in large part to her wonderful doctors, but also to the multitude of prayers for her. Keep those prayers going - they've been so powerful and healing for her.

David is going up to see her tomorrow (I wish I could go with him) and I've given him several messages to deliver to her and to her family.

I can't think of anything else too exciting to dish out - honestly, I'm in Nebraska. How exciting can it get?

Baby steps are still steps...

Greb and I at a 4-H House party.

Well, my girl keeps on truckin' along. Each day, I read the updates on Greb's website and each day, there are several posts detailing her tiny steps toward recovery.

Even though her steps toward recovery may be small, they're still steps.

Of course, like everyone else, I wish her steps were a little bigger! I really would love to be able to see her, or at the least just talk to her on the phone. But, I know she'll get there eventually.

The good thing is, she was incredibly active and today. She was moving her hands and arms, squeezing her hands and her eyes were fluttering quite a bit.

Greb's Aunt Jan is the one who posts most of the updates on the website and, as she says, Greb was partying this morning.

I have to say, I've never met her Aunt Jan, after reading all of her posts, I feel like I know her. I can see her in my mind and I really admire her for her dedication to Kristina and for her ability to make every situation better. It's hard for a lot of us to sit off to the side and read what's going on without being able to be there, but Aunt Jan (as I have come to know her) is always positive and has a way of lightening the mood - even when the situation calls for a somber mood.

Of course, keep praying. I know she'll get better because she's strong (and incredibly stubborn).

On another note, I'm pretty excited about next weekend. Since next weekend is the fourth of July (and of course my favorite Aunt's birthday), I have an extra day off. So, I'm going to fly out to Denver and meet David out there to hang out with his family. I'm so ready for a whole weekend off and to have some time relaxing. And, of course, we know how much I LOVE to take pictures. So, I'm ready to head out there again and snap some photos of those beautiful Rocky Mountains.

This is the time when I really wish I had one of those super nice digital camers. Nikon makes a couple of models that are excellent for day-to-day photos with superior professional quality. Those cameras are just one step down from their professional line and I would love to have one. I keep trying to drop the hints for David - I mean, honestly - that would make the perfect wedding gift.

Anyway. I can't think of anything else...just the normal hump day things today. Working the week away and I'm almost to the end of it!

One of those days...

First of all, let me tell you how much I love my future husband. I tend to think of him as a pretty cool kid. He likes sports and he's never met a person he doesn't know. But, most people don't know his dirty little secret: David watches the NASA Channel. Seriously. Anyway, tonight, I was talking to him on the phone and I told him to switch his TV to the Discovery Channel (I know, my favorite channel. But, I freely admit to being a geek, remember?) because "When We Left Earth" was on. It's a show all about NASA programs and missions.

David's response? "I'm in retard heaven - like, full on. With padded rooms and blinking lights and everything!"

I thought it was funny. His little comment made my rough day a little better, and my Aunt Cheryl followed it up with the funniest mental image I've ever had. I hope she reads this post - just so she knows that I was doubled over laughing my head off in my hotel room. My neighbors probably weren't too happy with the ruckus I was making.

The story behing the email Cheryl sent me is this:

I'm not going to go into too much detail, to spare Cheryl from certain humiliation. But, just picture a full-grown man on a three wheeler, with his tiny little wife riding along. With them, actually on the three wheeler is their big, floppy-eared hound dog that likes the three wheeler too and the wind in her face. Then, picture a fast pase, lots of bumps and a woman screaming repeatedly. Now that's comedy.

Anyway, now for the explanation of today's title.

I've been in New York for half of the week for a conference for work. I got in Thursday night (after being delayed in Cleveland for a couple of hours) and was supposed to leave today. Yep, supposed to. My flight out of Albany was supposed to leave at 1:05. When we were supposed to start boarding at 12:30, they told us we were going to be delayed for just a bit because Newark had a ground stop on everything.

This is that point in the story where the most experienced of travelers insert, "Oh no. You were connecting in Newark? What, are you stupid?" Apparently.

Ok. We're delayed for a little bit. They told us Newark would give them an update in about half an hour. At this point, I'm okay with that. I was supposed to have a three hour layover in Newark anyway, so I knew I would have plenty of time to make my connecting flight. SIX HOURS LATER, we were still delayed. In fact, at around 4, they went ahead and put us on the plane because they had finally gotten clearance from Newark. We boarded, taxied, and then waited -waited for an hour and a half - before we waited some more and taxied back to the gate.

I decided when I got back off of the plane, I was just going to cancel my ticket. I knew that if I ever did get to Newark, even if my connecting flight had been delayed too, it probably would have been delayed enough that they were going to cancel it anyway. And, I knew I would much rather tackle the smaller Albany airport than the nasty, bad-reputation Newark airport OVERNIGHT. So, I canceled my flight and had it re-booked, called a hotel and got a room and a shuttle, and settled in for the night.

The good news? Continental couldn't get me out of Albany until about 6:20 p.m. tomorrow night. Even better. Oh well. I'll still get home. And, I have my computer with me so I can sit in my room tomorrow and get some work done that has to be finished.

So, that's my ranting and raving for today. To put it all in perspective is my friend Kristina. But, that's nothing out of the ordinary. Even before her accident, she was usually the one responsible for helping me to rethink things or look on the flip-side.

Today, Greb had a little set back. They found a little bit of pneumonia in her lungs, but the doctors don't seem to be too worried about it. I guess there isn't any fluid surrounding it, so that's a good sign. They were able to culture it and will be able to start her on some antibiotics today. And, after her antics last night, she was wiped out today. So, there wasn't much 'waking' today, just resting and some physical therapy.

I'll leave you with this:

Be sure to thank God for crappy days like this and the moments that make those crappy days mean something more.

Praise God!

I'm not leaving too much time here between my last post and this one. But, something occurred to me this morning while checking my email: those of you who regularly read my blog might like to check up on Kristina, too.

Here I was talking about the power of faith and prayer last night, and I didn't give you all a chance to get to know Kristina and pray for her yourself. If you would like to visit the website her family has set up, the address is as follows:

http://caringbridge.org/visit/kristinagrebner

Now, for the news of this morning!

I left a message for Greb (that's my nickname for her) last night telling her all about my conference and what I had been doing. And, I told her I was so proud of her for all of the progress that she had made, and that I had to keep reminding myself that her recovery was on her schedule, and not mine. I told her that she needed to keep fighting to wake up out of her coma, that I was praying for her recovery and that I knew my dad was watching over her and helping her along. All of the messages posted to her website are read to Kristina - the doctors have told her parents that she can hear what's going on and that reading these messages will be comforting to her.

This morning, like I have done most mornings, I got up and checked her website for updates first thing. I couldn't have been happier when I read the journal update.

Last night around midnight, Greb starting moving a lot on her left side. She starting trying to take off the neck and chest brace she has on. On her right side, they have restraints around her wrist to keep her from removing her feeding tube, and she kept trying to move her hand. Gary, her father, asked her to raise her left hand if she wanted the restraint off, and she did. So, they removed the restraint and she started moving her right side. She also made a noise like she was trying to respond to the nurses, was sweating a lot (which apparently is a good sign) and had a lot of movement in her eyes.

So, all signs are pointing to her trying to wake up and come back to us! I'm so happy - I left her a message on the website telling her to tell her mom, dad, brother and family how much she loves them when she wakes up, and then to call me because I just couldn't wait to hear her voice!

When my dad died, unlike most people, it reaffirmed my faith in God - it strengthened my faith and belief. Watching (from afar) one of my closest friends go through an accident like this is just more proof that God is wonderful and almighty. I know all of the prayers for Kristina have been heard and he has sent his angels down to be with her. I can't wait for that next update that tells me she's talking...probably about how the Cubs are going to beat the White Sox in the cross town series...

Faith is powerful...

It's finally the end of a rocky week. Unfortunately, I think the weekend is going to be rocky, too.

Kristina's family has been updating the website frequently with her current condition. If fact, I check it almost more often than I check my email. The good news is, everytime I check it, it seems like they have some new piece of good information to report about her progress.

I know there are hundreds of people praying for her and it has been so wonderful to see faith at work. All of the people praying for her have put theirs on the line and it's working. God is truly taking care of my friend and is healing her...ever so slowly.

And, that's the bad part. Even though she continues to make progress, there are still some things that are scary. She will move her arms, legs, finger and toes on command, but she still isn't speaking or coherent. And, that is scary.

I'm so used to coming home from work, turning on the computer and talking with Kristina. She's always been such a good friend, and one that takes a special interest in my life. One of Kristina's best friends from college said it best; she said Kristina collects people like most people collect stamps or coins. Every person that Kristina comes in contact with holds a special place in her heart and she always makes you feel like you're the most important person when she talks to you.

So, I guess what this is boiling down to is this: I have a free weekend next weekend and I just have this overwhelming feeling that I HAVE to go home to see her. I know she and her family would understand why if I didn't go. I'm a long way away and it's expensive to get home. And, she keeps getting better...but, I still want to go home and see her. I need to be there with her, even if it's only for an hour.

I talked to David and he thinks I should come home if I really want to. I'm going to call mom and see what she thinks - hopefully I can get something figured out.

A rough couple of days...

It seems like it keeps getting harder and harder sit down and write on here. I've been so busy trying to get settled into work and traveling I just haven't had the time to write as often as I want to. To top it off it has been kind of rough the past couple of weeks.

I can't remember if I included this on an earlier post - I may have, but I'm just not sure. Anyway, one of my very close friends lost his father a couple of weeks ago. Of course, I was gone doing some training for work and wasn't able to make it down to the services - which absolutely killed me. I know what it's like to lose a parent, and I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. And, I just really would have liked to have been there for him. I saw him last week and seemed to be in good spirits, but, my friend is often very hard to read. He keeps things pretty close and doesn't really want to let anyone in.

I understand how he feels - I was the same way. I guess, I kind of still am. It's hard to think about sometimes and I still don't really feel 'okay' with it. But, I suppose that's one of those things you never really do feel okay with. I just hope he talks to someone about it. I didn't and I feel like it took me a lot longer to accept what happened.

Needless to say, when I heard about my friend's dad, it was a hard day for me, too. Partially because we were so close, and I knew his father pretty well. And, partly because all of those memories of my dad came back, too.

Then, just when I was starting to get over that hump, Kristina, one of my best friends that I went to college and lived with was in a serious accident back home in Illinois. She was on her way home from her boyfriend's house and was t-boned by another vehicle. She fractured her skull and her pelvis and had some neck injuries. They had to airlift her to St. Francis Hospital in Peoria, and for the past couple of days, she's been in a coma.

Now, I like Nebraska so far, but this is when it gets hard. I know if something like that happened to me, Kristina would be in her car and by my side. I want so much to be that for her, but here I sit, 8 hours away from her. Even though there isn't a thing I could do for her - I could at least be at the hospital praying for her.

Another girl we went to school with has been up to the hospital and keeps sending reports out to all of us. The good news is, she woke up today. She looked at her mom and squeezed hand and looks to be making progress - what a blessing!

She's strong - and I knew she'd pull through. But, with such a serious accident, it's just plain scary to think about. When I first got the news, it didn't really sink in just how serious her injuries were.

David is good friend's with Kristina's boyfriend, Stephen, and has been on the phone with him trying to keep up with the news of Kristina's condition. David, of course, feels so bad for Stephen. Because Kristina was coming from Stephen's house, David sensed that maybe Stephen was feeling guilty about her accident - something David said he could identify with. I think he was hoping to maybe get the chance to drive up there later in the week after she is transfered out of the ICU and can have more visitors.

I'm hoping I can put some more encouraging and better news up here later in the week.

I haven't forgotten...

I know, I know. Those of you who actually do read my blog have begun to wonder if I have fallen off the face of the planet. The answer is obviously "no" - but, I've been close.

The last couple of weeks have been an absolute whirlwind! The weekend before I started work, I decided to drive over to Ames, Iowa to visit my best friend, Rachel. A good friend of ours was getting married that last weekend in May, so I decided it would be fun to drive over to Ames on Friday and then ride down to Quincy, Ill. with Rachel to go to the wedding. Then, some really nasty storms rolled through Nebraska on Thursday evening. So, I called my friend and said, "So, um, people are dying in Nebraska. I'm coming to Iowa a day earlier." She laughed and said I was more than welcome to live in her basement.

So, I went ahead and drove over to Iowa and had a wonderful time with her - it was absolutley wonderful to be able to catch up with her and spend some time with her in her new favorite town.

After I got home from Iowa, I packed up my things once again to get ready for work the next day. I got to the office Monday, June 2nd and promptly boarded a plane for Milwaukee. I spent the week in Milwaukee doing some training and sitting in on meetings. That doesn't sound like much, but I was absolutely shot at the end of the week. Finally, Friday rolled around and I was able to ride home (to Clinton that is) with a friend of mine that also works for the company I work for.

When I got home, I went to a horse show and worked for the weekend, then headed to my house to work on Monday.

But, the middle of this week (ending with this afternoon) was the best - and really what I was looking forward to. Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday of this week was my little sister's state FFA convention. Janell served as a state officer this year and her 'retiring' convention was this week. And, I have to say, coming from a past state officer myself, her convention was wonderful.

Watching her this week was like being in high school all over again and watching the state officers on stage with awe and admiration. She and her teammates were so confident and put together a wonderful and entertaining convention.

Janell gave her retiring address on Wednesday afternoon and I just couldn't believe how confident and smart and well-spoken she was. I was so proud of her - I think more than she will ever know. I looked out at the crowd and saw how inspiring she was to everyone that watched her and couldn't help but think of how much she had grown up and all of the amazing things she would accomplish.

Now, I'm sitting at David's house (because part of the wonderfulness - and yes, that's a word - of being at home is being able to see my fiance that is normally eight hours away) watching a movie and relaxing and thinking about all of the things I need to work on tomorrow while I'm at work.

After work, I think I'm going to drive over to Champaign and join David at a work event he has to attend, and then enjoy my last Saturday at home before I have to fly back to Nebraska on Sunday.

Whew. It's been a long week.